Better Red Than Dead

Arlene Dahl, 1965

Susan Hayward in Where Love Has Gone (1964, Paramount)

Rhonda Fleming, c. 1964

Back to the Bleach

Mae West in Myra Breckenridge (1970, 20th Century Fox)

Lana Turner at the "Legendary Ladies" series at New York's Town Hall, 1976

Ginger Rogers, 1976

Mansfield Menagerie Monday

Alas, poor Jayne -- toward the end, her pets had more good hair days than she did.

About Town

Seen tonight at a preview performance of the brilliant new production of Gore Vidal's The Best Man: Liza Minnelli. We can report that Liza looked terrific in a canary yellow coat, graciously signed autograph after autograph for the fans who flocked around her, and when she hit the refreshment bar, she ordered Twizzlers with a Z.

Love, Ann Miller Style

E.J. Peaker and Ann Miller in the Love, American Style episode "Love and the Christmas Punch" (originally aired November 17, 1972)

Between the hair, the marabou and the jewelry, one wonders if there was any room on the set for actual furniture?

Where Have All the Songbirds Gone?

Our musing for the day: we lament the complete absence from the press release lexicon of these delightful turns of phrase -- "glamorous songstress"; "exciting young thrush"; "versatile song stylist"; "slinky cafe chanteuse." Come back, Lana Cantrell -- all is forgiven.

Miss Peggy Lee

Diamonds, furs, falls, and a Vaseline-covered lens are a girl's best friend.

Bead and Feather 'Em

How can they sing with sequins in their eyes?

Wah, Wah, Wah, Dolly

"I was looking out the window on the 18th floor of the Queen Elizabeth Hotel [in Toronto] . . . I thought, just one more move . . . and this terrible pain will stop, this pain of losing it for all time, they're all forgotten performances, it will stop, the moment that I hit, hit jumping out the window. That's exactly what I wanted to do." - Carol Channing, on contemplating suicide after Barbra Streisand was chosen for the film version of Hello, Dolly

Face Off

Constance Bennett in Madame X (1966, Universal)

"Her face was her talent, and when it dropped, so did her career -- right out of sight!" - Bette Davis on Constance Bennett

Bette Davis in Dead Ringer (1964, Warner Bros.)

Girl Talk

Lucille Ball in the I Love Lucy episode "The Moustache" (originally aired March 17, 1952)

"When I worked with Katharine Hepburn, decades ago, I was terrified of her -- that voice, her jaw, the whole package. I'm still scared of her!" - Lucille Ball

Katharine Hepburn in Sylvia Scarlett (1935, RKO)

Coming Up Rose's What?

Ethel Merman in the original Broadway production of Gypsy, 1959

"They've nicknamed her husband the Lizard of Roz, and what they call Rosalind Russell I can't repeat -- but it does rhyme with 'witch,' and you'll find her sort in a kennel!" - Ethel Merman

Rosalind Russell in Gypsy (1962, Warner Bros.)

Our Birthday is Approaching...

...and we do think that coordinated gifts are awfully nice. Just a suggestion, darlings!

Bust Up

Shirley Eaton

In 1964, Goldfinger briefly made a sensation out of Shirley Eaton, whose nude, spray-painted body remains an iconic screen image. With typical British reserve, Miss Eaton gave her opinions of her fellow sex symbols to columnist Earl Wilson. Hollywood's bombshells must have been eager to send this bundle back to Britain after hearing these cheerful little earfuls:

"I don't want to be a sex symbol, or anything stupid like that...I mean perfectly terrible symbols like...Jayne Mansfield. [She's] laughed at."

"Anita Ekberg's even worse... She has a hard, brittle face -- and I don't think she's conspicuously talented."

"Carroll Baker? If that's going to be the new American sex symbol, I feel sorry for the American woman!...She wears a low dress and a big fur, but she's like a little housewife."

"People have been...saying really terrible things about Elizabeth Taylor. How she shouldn't wear bikinis, things like that. I can't bear people who are always downing people, can you?"

The Period J.C.

That's why milady is a tramp.

It Happened

Yul Brynner in The Buccaneer (1958, Paramount)

Hurd Hatfield in El Cid (1961, Allied Artists)

Yul Brynner and Hurd Hatfield. One wonders if the fey Dorian Gray got to be King, at least for a night...

Someone Please Revive Jerry Herman

Lucy is Mame-ing another of his scores, and croaking out an audition of "I Won't Send Roses."

Have a Marvy Marabou Monday

Made possible by Miss Mansfield.

(Just one a day this week, darlings... we'll be back in gear by next week.)

Swamp Things

We're breaking ourselves back in gently, darlings... "real" posts will commence in due time!

No "Maybe"s...

Dear Friends,

Firstly, we would like to apologize for the lack of communication over these past few months; as one wag chided us in an e-mail, "Here at Stirred, Straight Up, it is permanently Paulette Goddard!"

Secondly, we want to reassure everyone that we are alive and well. Our intention was never to arouse concern, and we are deeply grateful for the private e-mails we've received, as well as the public inquiries.

Finally, SSUWAT will, indeed, return. It's been a longer process than anticipated, but we love it -- and you -- far too much to let it fade away. The world is bereft of glamour, it would seem, and if our mission is less lofty than curing disease and abolishing war, we still endeavor to celebrate that bygone magic and mystique -- of Paulette Goddard, 1962, and everyone and everything else we cherish and hold dear.

Above all, we cherish and hold dear the friends we've made through this medium. Individually and collectively, you are the reason we are impatient and anxious to return.

TJB/SSUWAT