THIS IS NOT YOUR BLOGGER.
I wouldn't exactly call myself "docile," but it takes a lot to piss me off. I mean really, truly get me riled up, not merely annoyed for an instant. (I may appear as if I'm actually upset by the guy wearing his baseball cap inside the four star restaurant, but trust me, it'll pass.)
Anyway, I was at the convenience store today, attempting to buy a lottery ticket. I approached the counter; the clerk working today isn't someone I'm buddy-buddy with, but we know each other by sight, and I always smile and say "please" and "thank you" when I interact with him, or any of the other fellows who work there.
"I'd like one Quick Pick on the Mega Millions, please." (A girl can dream, can't she?)
He responded with something absolutely unintelligible. I looked at him in utter confusion, and he then said something else, also completely garbled to my ears. Finally, a third time, he said, "Konichiwa!"
Ah.
He'd been trying out his various Asian dialects on me.
"No," I said firmly.
"No? I didn't get it?"
"No. You didn't get it. One Quick Pick on the Mega Million, please."
I was really annoyed, and I'm sure my face registered my displeasure, but I kept my tongue in check. Maybe, I thought to myself, he just thought he was being friendly and chatty. Maybe he doesn't realize how tactless and how...well, racist he's being.
I don't go through my day with the Race Chip on my shoulder. Honestly, I hardly ever think about it at all. For all you disinterested readers out there, I was born in Seoul, adopted when I was 2 months old, and forget that I'm Asian at all until I occasionally catch a glimpse in the mirror. I'm something of a mutt, which I like; I don't identify as specifically "Korean," and have been mistaken for everything from Thai to Filipino to -- I swear -- African American. Honest to God. But that's another story.
Anyway, my point is, I'm not hyper-sensitive to the whole race issue. I think Mr. Moto films are adorable. My Korean dry cleaning lady's accent cracks me up. Japanese tourists frantically snapping photographs of their dinner entrees at expensive restaurants tickle me. I've been known to say, "Me love you long time." (Jokingly, I must add. Not as a pick up line. Or a thank you.) Stereotypes exist because they have a basis in truth. I trust in my own individuality to quietly counteract those stereotypes one idiot at a time.
So, as I say, I'm not a militant, confrontational Asian warrior looking for battle with the first ignoramus I come across. I gave this convenience store clerk the benefit of the doubt. When he returned with my lottery ticket, he had a smug grin on his face, and continued to speak to me in pidgin-Asian-whatever language. So much for trusting in basic human decency.
I just left, seething, silently promising myself to never patronize them again. As I left, I wondered two things: Should I have made a scene, and called this idiot out on his racism? (Being Haitian, I'm sure he wouldn't have appreciated any derogatory comments made towards his race or country.) And, more disturbingly, would I keep my promise to not use the store's services again, even though it would mean going out of my way to use a different store?
Life should be fabulous. I hate it when assholes make it complicated.
Sheesh!
ReplyDeleteIt's unbelievable how tactless and rude people are.
My best friend, Mark, is Japanese/ Canadian. I joke that he's about as Japanese as I am.
Recently, while visiting here, he was accosted by some genial tourists who asked him to take their picture. They trotted out the "Konichiwa" and the pidgin English too. They were dumbfounded when he answered back in Canadian.
He took their picture, but it galled him a bit. I don't blame him.
Every Asian friend I have has similar stories. People are just stupid, and I think they are more racist with Asian people than any other nationality for some reason, maybe because there's not been enough education to show that racism is not just about African Americans.
Anyway, I think you were right not to make a scene. I'd be all for scenes if I thought they'd work, but I doubt it really would have.
I don't know what I'd do if I were you. Maybe avoid the store? At least when he's there...and maybe write a letter to the manager, anonymously or not.
I'm not sure what I'd do.
Jason -- Are you familiar with the B'way show "Avenue Q"? One of the numbers is "Everyone's A Little Bit Racist," and it's SO true. We all are, to a degree, whether we like to admit it or not. It would be foolish and naive to think that we'll ever *completely* eradicate it.
ReplyDeleteBut what separates intelligent life from cretins is the common sense to treat each person as an individual, with common courtesy and respect, whether or not you harbor some sort of irrational prejudice against their race/religion/etc.
I have to say, in the prior instances when misguided "racism" has been directed towards me (usually in the comparatively gentle form of people complimenting me on my mastery of the English language, or, before hearing me speak, assuming that I have none), I've been willing to overlook it as nothing more than mere stupidity. In some cases, it's even well-intentioned. (Which makes it all the sadder, in my opinion.) What pissed me off about this guy is that he knew full well that I was annoyed by it, and then he *continued.*
What will I do? Not sure. Watch this space.
And I thought you were French, isn't it JeanLoup? Saw your comment on Fabulon! I'm gonna make that my new bar name too!
ReplyDeleteJust David -- Isn't *everyone* French after the fourth cocktail?
ReplyDeleteWhee!
I think he was flirting. You dickens, you.
ReplyDeleteLOL!
ReplyDeleteWhen you've got it, you've got it. It's a blessing and a burden.
One must rise above ignorance.
ReplyDeleteJust go on with your life as if nothing happened, it's not worth your concern.
I just always felt bad for the Asian actors. Even when the part was written for an Asian... they still couldn't get it.
ReplyDeleteSame with Ava in Showboat. Should of been Lena's or Dorothy's role.
As far as the use of Konichiwa. Some people are so excited they know how to say it and were just waiting for the opp. to use it.
Unfortunately many people are not aware of the diff cultures under the umbrella of being Asian.
And then many are just a-holes or a combination of the two.
What do you think of this?
ReplyDeleteThere are certain types of East Asian physical types. Northern Asian, Southern Asian and islander aborigines.
Koreans are essentially of the Northern Asian type, which migrated from Siberia in the last ice age. Northern Asians are characterized by high cheek bones, small flat noses and wide eyes with an epicanthal fold. Northern Asians evolved from areas where it was very cold, and there was a high wind chill factor. High cheek bones and a flatter face helps the heat distribute better in and around the head. wider set eyes helped keep wind out as well.
The Chinese are a blend of Northern and Southern Asians. South Asians have rounder faces, slightly larger eyes and darker skin. It is well known among Chinese themselves that people from the North and the South look noticeably different.
The Japanese are a blend of Northern, Southern and islander aborigine (in approximately that order), with the Northern influence being more prominent on average.
Of course this doesn't speak for Asian/White mixes. Etc etc etc
Well, it's interesting and undeniable that every Asian country has its own physically defining features, plus the differing features of people from the same country, but different regions.
ReplyDeleteI've always suspected that I'm a mongrel with some European blood in there, just based on my coloring, my hair (when I had it), and other factors. For better or worse, I'm happy just being "Asian," and leaving it at that. I don't have any particular desire to dig deeper, although my parents always left the door open for me to learn more about my birth heritage.
There's no pure anything anyway.
ReplyDeleteI'm a mutt mix, half English and a little German, Scottish and French.
The only ones that care are the nazis and the KKK anyway.
I'm fascinated by what mix makes up what features, having been a makeup artist.
"We had faces then."