Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Stormy Weather


While we realize that there are vastly more important issues in the world today, we would like to take a moment to bemoan a curious phenomenon which occurs in New York City on rainy days: people completely lose their minds, as well as their taste. Particularly businessmen.

On our morning subway ride, we counted only two legitimately chic raincoats adorning the male species of the 6 train; otherwise, it was a sad sack sea of off-season parkas; those awful London Fog-esque trench coats with hems which stop just short of the ankle; and, worst of all, short windbreakers and sports team bombers worn over suits. Worse yet were the shoes accompanying the suits: dirty moccasins and beat up old lace-ups and smelly sneakers, presumably chosen because they'd be no worse for the wear after exposure to the rain.

Gentlemen, let us implore you to invest in 3 essential items which will see you through the elements in a much more suave fashion:

1) A practical, spartanly stylish raincoat, neither freakishly fashion-forward nor boringly un-chic. Navy or beige would be the best colors, and it should be long enough to cover your suit jacket or sport coat.


2) A proper umbrella -- and by this we mean a full-size, good quality umbrella. You can spend hundreds (or more!) on bespoke-quality English brolleys, but a sturdy $75 Brooks Brothers model suits us fine. When you think of all the cheap umbrellas you've either had to throw out after they splinter and spindle, or which you've left behind in taxis and stores, the sum probably far exceeds that amount, so consider it a sound investment.


3) Galoshes. We realize that practically no one wears them anymore (except us), but we must tell you, they've more than paid back their modest $25 cost. Instead of gingerly stepping around puddles and trying to run between the raindrops, or donning ugly, who-cares-if-they-get-wet shoes, simply slip your rubbers on and wear even your best footwear with confidence. They're not purdy, but they're practical; and when you arrive at your destination, you can slip them off and show off your fancy footwear.

(As endorsed by LEFFOT)

Follow this advice, and you can rest assured that you'll never be the recipient of our disapproving side glances and tongue clucking one rainy morning on the subway. You're welcome.

3 comments:

  1. simply slip your rubbers on

    I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve had to say that.



    wv: fauck

    ReplyDelete
  2. It is about time that someone tried to educate the masses!

    ReplyDelete
  3. MJ -- As many times as you've wanted to fauck, I guess!

    David Toms -- It's our burden; we must bear it. Giggle!

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