Try The Worryin' Way

Girls, you may lose your man...

But you'll also lose weight and look fabulous, darlings. 

And the best part? 

You don't need no Metrecal. Thank God.

A Lovely Way To Spend An Evening

Day-O. Dayum.

Miss Pat Collins

The hip, hair-hopping hypnotist.

Kind Of Similar

9:30pm on Easter Night, at 54 Below. There's an elephant in the room, and her name is Barbra.

Although Roslyn Kind only made one, brief, passing mention of "my sister" during her entire 90 minute performance (and not by name), the virtual presence of Barbra Streisand still loomed large over the proceedings. Nearly everything about Ms. Kind's physical appearance seemed deliberately calculated to suggest her older sister: the meticulously-straightened honey blonde hair; the flawlessly manicured talons; the expertly extended Cleopatra eye makeup; the black pantsuit which recalled a more conservative, age appropriate version of Streisand's famous see-through Scassi pajamas; and the regal schnozz, often turned in profile. It's all the more unnerving when one realizes that this uncanny doppelganger bears very little resemblance to the Roslyn Kind who had been a fledgling RCA recording artist and nightclub singer in the 1960's and 1970's. When did this complete metamorphosis take place?

Even more disconcerting than the physical similarities were Ms. Kind's vocal mannerisms and performance tics, which also practically screamed, "I'm the greatest star!" It was like watching an extraordinarily talented Streisand impersonator. Kind's early RCA recordings reveal a slight vocal similarity, although Kind was a little more nasal and perhaps not as warmly burnished in tone as her sister. But now, whether by design, or with age, or perhaps both, Kind's deepened register has rendered her voice an almost exact replica of Streisand's. And Kind's phrasing and cadence have become eerily like that of her sibling, both in singing and speech.

There are differences, of course. For one thing, Kind is obviously a much more accessible artist than Streisand, willing to make direct contact with her audience. She's nice, and utterly likable. Down to earth. Homier. She takes her frequent sips of hot tea from a paper delicatessen cup, not Limoges. Frankly, one senses that the chief attraction for Kind's devoted cult of fans (many of whom peppered the performance with "Brava"'s and "Welcome home"'s) is that she is the warm, friendly, approachable flip-side-Streisand that they wish her imposing, forbidding sister could be. Making her entrance through the audience to the deliciously daffy "It's a Beautiful Day" (a tuneful late Sixties period piece from her debut album), Ms. Kind passed out daisies to delighted audience members. Ms. Streisand, had she even considered such a move, would no doubt have assigned the task to the ushers.

And while Streisand is (or at least, was) well-known for her kooky, quirky sense of humor, you can hardly imagine the almost frighteningly regal Streisand of today getting saucy, as Ms. Kind did, on "I Can Cook, Too" (from Comden and Green's On the Town); or camping it up on the special material "If He Was Straight (And I Were Young)," cleverly juxtaposed with "The Boy Next Door" from Meet Me in St. Louis (1944).

Interestingly, for all of her seemingly-conscious mimicking of her sister's physical and vocal traits, Ms. Kind studiously avoided performing any material which could be connected with Streisand, with the possible exception of that snippet of "The Boy Next Door," which Big Sis Babs had recorded on her 1967 Simply Streisand album; and Sergio Mendes' "So Many Stars," which Streisand included on her recent album of Alan and Marilyn Bergman lyrics, but is not particularly closely associated with her. Of course, Streisand has recorded so extensively, that this narrows the field somewhat for Ms. Kind. On the plus side, necessity being the mother of invention, Ms. Kind has unearthed some hidden treasures which are rarely heard; on the negative side of the ledger, some should have remained buried.

Which is not to say that there were any truly bad choices in Ms. Kind's repertoire, because there weren't; only some hackneyed ones. Her "signature" song, and first encore, for instance, was "Can You Read My Mind," the pretty-but-sappy love theme from Superman (1978), replete with outer space and flying metaphors shoehorned into the lyrics. We're fairly certain that even Maureen McGovern, who had the original hit with the soundtrack version, has dropped it from her act by now.

However, in another, quite welcome parallel to Streisand, Ms. Kind, like her sister, can make even the most awkward or trite lyric sound exponentially weightier by the innate gravitas in her delivery. And, unlike Streisand, whose approach to these lesser lyrics is sometimes akin to swatting a fly with an Oldsmobile, Kind's approach is somewhat more delicate. She performed a remarkably beautiful rendition of the little-known Burt Bacharach/Hal David tune, "I Just Have to Breathe," a lighter-than-air souffle of a song which could have collapsed under a more heavy handed interpretation.

Other highlights of the evening included a gossamer ballad penned by the wonderful Ann Hampton Callaway titled "Perfect"; a soaring "Kiss Her Now" from Jerry Herman's Dear World, combined rather brilliantly with his "It Only Takes a Moment" from Hello, Dolly (another Streisand drive-by, although her character doesn't sing it in the score); and Kind's final number of the night, "Come What May," which was one of Patti LaBelle's signature tunes in the 1970's. That she delivered it so beautifully, eradicating, at least for the moment, any memory of LaBelle's formidable performance, is praiseworthy. Even if it did still remind you of someone else.

Young Man With A Horn

Bandleader Ray Anthony, 1945. Blow, man, blow!

Official Ray Anthony site HERE.

Chart Toppers...

Goldie & The Gingerbreads

 

Lynda Lydell

 

Glenda Collins

 

Dusty Springfield

 

Bernadette Carroll

 

Chris Clark

 

Timi Yuro

 

Ellie Greenwich

 

Linda Janssen (of The Angels)

 

Beverly Warren

 

Dolly Parton


....hair hoppers.

Be A Team Player

It's easy when you're your own group.

Strike Up The Band!

MITZI GAYNOR

September 4, 1931

Two Sides Of Miss Dionne Warwick

Here she is swinging...

...and now, doing an interpretive dance...

Either way, she is a sublime somnambulist.

Terrific Trios

Cruising With Al and Annie

Compare and contrast.

Blaze of Glory

The film is called Blazing Stewardesses.

The set appears to be a barbecue pit at an abandoned Sandals resort in Albuquerque.

The extras are bored family members of the cast and crew.

We're fairly certain the credits include "Hair by Ann Miller, wardrobe by Dale Evans."

The song is a sub-Eydie Gorme ballad called "Now the Game is Over."

But Yvonne De Carlo is still selling it as if it's Stephen fucking Sondheim. Work.

Armchair Traveler

Ann-Margret goes to Rio. With a stop in the Castro to pick up some safety gays.

Mambo Maloniano

Papa Loves Mambo... except when it kills him, of course.

On This Day...

June 21, 1983.

For once in her life, Miss Ross discovered that she did NOT need the wind machine.

Make Me Rainbows

Peter Allen explodes into a big, sparkly rainbow at the 1:36 mark.

We would expect, and accept, nothing less.

Fancy A Sunday Shag With Lulu?

Are You The Top?

COLE PORTER

June 9, 1891 - October 15, 1964

Let The Music Play

In response to several inquiries, we thought we would share a few examples of what our bespoke SSUWAT playlists look like (as opposed to setting our life to shuffle). We aren't providing audio (in the interest of not being fined or jailed), but many of you will either be familiar with at least a smattering of the selections; or be sufficiently intrigued to hunt some of them down on your own.

RUN WILD, RUN FREE

Girls in the garage! Girls gone zonk! Girls be trippin'!

 

1) "In a Long White Room" by Nancy Wilson (Capitol, 1969)

 

 

2) "Cinderella Could Have Saved Us All" by Connie Stevens (MGM, 1968)

3) "Saturday Night Didn't Happen" by Reparata and the Delrons (Mala, 1968)

4) "The Bubble Broke" by Lesley Gore (Mercury, 1967)

 

 

5) "Wasn't it You" by Petula Clark (Warner Bros., 1966)

6) "Copacabana Velha De Guerra" by Elis Regina (Philips, 1970)

7) "Les Papillons Noirs" by Michèle Arnaud with Serge Gainsbourg (EMI-Pathe, 1966)

 

 

8) "Sunshine" by Shirley Bassey (Columbia, 1966)

9) "It's Break Up Time" by Sue Thompson (Hickory, 1965)

10) "I'm Gonna Destroy That Boy" by The What Four (Columbia, 1966)

11) "It's a Different World" by Connie Francis (MGM, 1966)

 

 

12) "Tu N'as Pas Le Droit" by France Gall (Philips, 1966)

13) "Mediterranean Sky" by Jackie De Shannon (Imperial, 1970)

14) "Run Wild, Run Free" by Claudine Longet (A/M, 1970)

 

 

15) "Smoke" by Bobbie Gentry (Capitol, 1970)

16) "Tell Me You Love Me, Junie Moon" by Liza Minnelli (A/M, 1970)

17) "Love's Lines, Angles and Rhymes" by The 5th Dimension (Bell, 1971)

 

 

18) "The Interim" by Diana Ross (Motown, 1970)

19) "A Famous Myth" by The Carnival (World Pacific, 1969)

20) "Meanwhile Back in Real Life" by Robin Wilson (A/M, 1969)

21) "Reflections" by Roslyn Kind (RCA, 1970)

 

 

22) "Tunesmith" by Vikki Carr (Liberty, 1967)

23) "The Man in the Raincoat" by Anita Bryant (Columbia, 1967)

 

 

24) "Whistling Away the Dark" by Julie Andrews (RCA, 1970)

25) "Derradeira Primavera" by Nara Leão (Philips, 1964)

 

WANG DANG DOODLE

"You had to pick a colored record, didn't you? That's nice for the neighbors!"

 

1) "Deep Dark Secret" by Dee Dee Sharp (Cameo-Parkway, 1964)

2) "Ain't Gonna Cry No More" by LaVern Baker (Atlantic, 1963)

3) "Casanova" by Erlene and Her Girlfriends (Old Town, 1962)

4) "Putty in Your Hands" by The Shirelles (Scepter, 1962)

5) "Push a Little Harder" by The Avons (Groove, 1963)

 

 

6) "Do Wah Diddy" by The Exciters (United Artists, 1963)

7) "I Don't Want No Mama's Boy" by Erma Franklin (Epic, 1963)

8) "I Just Want to Make Love to You" by Etta James (Argo, 1960)

 

 

9) "Git Out" by Mitty Collier (Chess, 1967)

10) "One Monkey Don't Stop No Show, Pt. 1" by Honey Cone (Hot Wax, 1971)

11) "He Was Really Sayin' Somethin'" by The Velvelettes (V.I.P., 1964)

 

 

12) "Got Myself a Good Man" by Gladys Knight and The Pips (Soul, 1969)

13) "Wang Dang Doodle" by The Pointer Sisters (Blue Thumb, 1973)

14) "Fujiyama Mama" by Wanda Jackson (Capitol, 1960)

 

 

15) "Watch Out, Sally!" by Diane Renay (MGM, 1964)

16) "I Want You to Be My Baby" by Ellie Greenwich (United Artists, 1968)

17) "Off and Running" by Lesley Gore (Mercury, 1966)

18) "Love Loves to Love Love" by Lulu (EMI, 1967)

 

 

19) "Haunted" by Dusty Springfield (Atlantic, 1971)

20) "Chained" by The Sweet Inspirations (Atlantic, 1969)

 

 

21) "Signed, Sealed, Delivered (I'm Yours)" by Evie Sands (Haven, 1976)

22) "Expressway to Your Heart" by Margo Thunder (Capitol, 1974)

23) "Mama Never Told Me" by Sister Sledge (Atlantic, 1973)

24) "After Loving You" by Jean Wells (Calla, 1967)

25) "Goodness, Gracious" by Kim Weston (Stax, 1974)

 

DREAMSVILLE

A lush day's journey into night...

 

1) "I Cover the Waterfront" by Cleo Laine (Philips, 1965)

2) "If I Should Lose You" by Doris Drew (Muse, 1957)

 

 

3) "There is No Greater Love" by Betty Carter (United Artists, 1965)

4) "Wild is the Wind" by Gloria Lynne (Everest, 1961)

5) "Where Flamingos Fly" by Jeanne Lee and Ran Blake (RCA Victor, 1962)

6) "Don't Smoke in Bed" by Peggy Lee (Capitol, 1969)

 

 

7) "Sol Da Meia Noite (Midnight Sun)" by Sylvia Telles (Elenco, 1963)

8) "Mountain High, Valley Low" by Jo Stafford (Columbia, 1955)

9) "Close Your Eyes" by Dolores Gray (Capitol, 1957)

 

 

10) "You're My Thrill" by Julie London (Liberty, 1957)

11) "Don't Want to Walk without You" by Annita Ray (Ava, 1962)

12) "Where Did You Go" by Chris Connor and Maynard Ferguson (Roulette, 1961)

13) "You Don't Know What Love Is" by Mavis Rivers (Capitol, 1960)

14) "Angel Eyes" by Nancy Wilson (Capitol, 1968)

15) "'Round Midnight" by Toni Harper (RCA Victor, 1962)

 

 

16) "The Thrill is Gone" by Ella Fitzgerald (Verve, 1964)

17) "Yesterdays" by Sylvia Syms (Columbia, 1959)

18) "I Thought of You Last Night" by Jeri Southern (Capitol, 1959)

19) "Remind Me" by June Christy (Capitol, 1960)

 

 

20) "Black is the Color of My True Love's Hair" by Helen Merrill (EmArcy, 1957)

21) "Where or When" by Kitty White (Roulette, 1958)

22) "The Good Life" by Sarah Vaughan (Roulette, 1963)

23) "Dreamsville" by Lola Albright (Columbia, 1959)

 

 

24) "In the Wee Small Hours of the Morning" by Morgana King (EmArcy, 1956)

25) "I'll Be Around" by Billie Holiday (Columbia, 1958)

 

SO MANY STARS

"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars..."

 

1) "How Do I Love Thee?" by Jayne Mansfield (MGM, 1964)

 

 

2) "I Start Counting" by Dusty Springfield (Philips, 1972)

3) "So Many Stars" by Sergio Mendes and Brasil '66 (A/M, 1968)

4) "No Moon at All" by Nana Mouskouri (Fontana, 1962)

5) "Night and Day" by Doris Day (Columbia, 1958)

6) "My Funny Valentine" by Petula Clark (Warner Bros., 1969)

 

 

7) "I'm in the Mood for Love" by Shirley Horn (Mercury, 1963)

8) "But Beautiful" by Peggy Lee (Capitol, 1961)

9) "The Nearness of You" by Jo Stafford (Columbia, 1956)

10) "You Go to My Head" by Dolores Gray (Capitol, 1957)

11) "Under a Blanket of Blue" by Patti Page (Mercury, 1956)

 

 

12) "Like Someone in Love" by Margaret Whiting (Capitol, 1955)

13) "A Quiet Thing" by Ann Hampton Callaway (DRG, 1994)

14) "It Happens Quietly" by Cleo Laine (CBS, 1984)

15) "Quietly There" by Sue Raney (Discovery, 1987)

16) "Misty" by Chris Connor (Atlantic, 1959)

17) "At Long Last Love" by Julie London (Liberty, 1965)

 

 

18) "Day by Day" by Betty Roché (Prestige, 1960)

19) "In a Sentimental Mood" by Phyllis Hyman (RCA, 1981)

20) "My One and Only Love" by Carmen McRae (Decca, 1955)

 

 

21) "The Very Thought of You" by Nancy Wilson (Capitol, 1963)

22) "I Thought About You" by Ella Fitzgerald (Verve, 1957)

23) "Deep Purple" by The King Sisters (Capitol, 1957)

 

 

24) "A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square" by Anita O'Day (Verve, 1955)

25) "London at Dawn" by Elizabeth Taylor and John Barry (Colpix, 1963)